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What is depression
really? Is there one concrete definition, or has the meaning loosened as our generation has continued it's downhill descent?
To me, depression is simply my life. I'm not suicidal. I'm not a cutter. I don't hate the world. I don't dress completely
in black. I'm just sad. I've been sad for what feels like my entire life, but that's not true. I was happy once and I can
vaguely remember what it felt like, but I can't touch it. I can't get that happiness back, I don't know how. That's what depression
is to me, knowing what happiness is, but never being able to touch it, to feel it.- Jenny Leigh
the girl who always looks sad but claims she’s fine.
the girl who puts sad away messages up everyday.
the girl who when she sees you, smiles a half a smile.
the
girl who always has time to listen to you vent and is willing to give her opinion to help you in anyway that she can.
the girl who cares about helping everyone but herself.
the girl who cries every night before she goes to sleep.
I want a day to go by
When I’m not trying to be
happy
They say she's strong
but they can't see the things she never shows, so alone she dies a little more everyday... making sure nobody knows,
they say she's stronger than any girl should be but maybe she's just better at
pretending than you.
i'm tired of smiling when i'm sad
i'm tired of laughing when i'm
mad
i'm tired of hiding the real me; but i'm
too scared of what others will see
Another poem, another line, another girl
pretending she's fine,
Another hour, another day, she wishes she could get away, Another heartbreak,
another tear, another excuse she doesn't wanna hear
Another paper, another pen, she writes she wants to
be strong again,
Another story, another lie, another night that she will cry,
Another band, another
song, another days passed, slowly gone,
Another scream, another doubt, ''Kick me while I'm down''
to him she'd shout
Another forced smile, another broken heart, Just another girl wishing life would restart...
"I'm never
going to show you how broken I am inside. I am never going to show you how I need you in my life. You'll never hear me say
that I miss you or find out that you're the reason that I cry. You'll never catch me.. because you'll never see me fall. I'm
just going to keep everything inside and smile through all the pain.. and even though I'm breaking down I'll always manage
to stay sane. I'll never show you what you want to see. I'm never going to let you see through me."
she's losing faith in what she knows.
hates her music;; hates all of her clothes.
thinks of surgery &
a new nose.
every calorie is a war.
she wishes god would give her some answers
& make her feel beautiful.
and she whispers
into the mirror as she wipes the running
eyeliner from her eyes.. »im so stupid«
Do you know what it feels
like to hate yourself?
Do you know what it feels like to wish you were dead?
Do you know what it feels
like to hate your world?
I do..& it's eating me up inside.
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